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Homer Simpson Accuses His Wife Marge of Being Tiger Woods' Mistress #-what Number is it Up To?
Reports just in allude to the misapprehension by Homer Simpson that his lovely wife Marge has somehow been involved in the Tiger Woods scandal. Marge hasn't yet denied ever having met the golfer and has hired a celebrity lawyer to represent her.
When Marge arrived home, he confiscated her cell phone so he could check her text messages and any suspicious numbers recorded on it. When he found nothing, he got so mad he hurled Marge's cell phone into the back of a passing dumpster.
Seeing her husband in such a frenzy, Marge confronted him about his weird behavior (again!). Even though the cell phone offered up no texts or suspicious phone numbers, Homer was still not convinced that Marge wasn't the "Simpson" referred to on television. He accused her of being one of the many Tiger Mistresses. A fierce row ensued and Marge stormed out of the house. She was seen later checking out one bedroom apartments across town. She has also supposedly hired a celebrity lawyer to represent her.
When approached for a comment about the latest Simpson family feud, son Bart issued a curt "no comment" and ran straight home to see what all the fuss was about.
Marge was heard talking to a friend saying "I'm thinking of coming out as Tiger's Mistress #- what number is it up to? I could sure do with that $20,000 a month in 'hush money' now I've left Homer. Tiger probably can't even remember all the mistresses, so I could even be up for one of those million dollar payouts to stay silent."
Meanwhile, Homer Simpson is conferring with son Bart to work out how to get Marge to come home to him.
This article is not written to discredit either Homer Simpson or his lovely wife Marge - or any other person with the surname "Simpson". It is published to throw a bit of humor into the ring midst an avalanche of Tiger Woods reports that are out of control. We all know Homer get out of control sometimes! Or is it most of the time?